What decisions have you already made that would help reduce stress and drama for you in a traumatic or survival situation?

Except for expressing anger towards my mom, because so early in life I had made the decision not to cause harm; to the best of my ability, I avoided doing what the monstrous men wanted. I firmly felt that they were responsible for the harm they wanted to cause; and therefore, they had to perform the heinous acts they wanted me to do. The age old: ‘Hurt this other person or we’ll hurt you.’ Well, obviously they were going to hurt me anyway; so if they wanted that other child hurt, they had to do it or they had to physically force me. Of course, physically I was too weak to fight them, but to the best of my ability in my mind I refused to accept the responsibility they wanted to heap upon me. Having pre-made decisions was something that helped me have some semblance of peace. It gave me some bit of shield from accepting their responsibility for the many horrible things they did. Of course, some of their insidious desire to put the responsibility for their actions on me still did get through. But knowing that the desire to cause harm did not come from within me helped me sort it out easier when I had the tools to heal all the havoc they wreaked within me.